I often wonder how low self-esteem and being a paid companion can possibly go hand-in-hand. After all, how can someone with self-esteem problems possibly post their near naked photos on the Internet and then demand hundreds of dollars for her time? Every paid companion must be a narcissist at some level.
As for me, I wouln't say that I had self-esteem issues growing up. Luckily, I went to a small town high school where we weren't privvy to certain brands of clothing or trends. Of course, there was no Internet, we didn't watch a lot of television and the only magazines available for our age group were Teen Beat and Seventeen. It was something else watching Beverly Hills 90210, but California and Beverly Hlls High were like different planets to us and we didn't even consider trying to emulate those characters.
Girls, especially, are taught from a young age to be modest. When we try on a pair of jeans we are forced to ask someone else, "Does this look OK?" because looking in the mirror and saying, "Damn, my butt looks good in these jeans!" is considered conceited and turns most people off. Basically, it's not OK to think we're attractive or sexy, at least not aloud. We're conditioned to seek acceptance from others and for many girls this causes problems well into adulthood.
So, let's get back to me. ;-)
I am humble and my secret to liking myself is by not comparing myself to others. Instead I compare myself to the way I've looked during the different times in my life. I can say, "This is the best I've ever looked."or "I can look better." I take stock of what I'm doing or not doing, how I feel mentally and physically and I add that to the equation when evaluating myself. What would be the point in comparing myself to anyone else?
People, like cities, have lost their individuality through chain stores and stereotypes. When you happen to find someone unique (without trying too hard because that's just as obvious), it's a special and exciting feeling. I hope that the gentlemen I have met have found me to be different (in a good way) and I hope the gentlemen I will someday meet find me to be a breath of fresh air. I like the feeling of bringing something special to someone's life.
My new website is up and running. I will warn you though, the text is in desperate need of updating. Unfortunately my site has not refreshed for me and I am unable to change the text or check my email at this time. Until then, I hope you enjoy my photos and the new design, which is streamlined, much like me.
Kate's New Site!
As for me, I wouln't say that I had self-esteem issues growing up. Luckily, I went to a small town high school where we weren't privvy to certain brands of clothing or trends. Of course, there was no Internet, we didn't watch a lot of television and the only magazines available for our age group were Teen Beat and Seventeen. It was something else watching Beverly Hills 90210, but California and Beverly Hlls High were like different planets to us and we didn't even consider trying to emulate those characters.
Girls, especially, are taught from a young age to be modest. When we try on a pair of jeans we are forced to ask someone else, "Does this look OK?" because looking in the mirror and saying, "Damn, my butt looks good in these jeans!" is considered conceited and turns most people off. Basically, it's not OK to think we're attractive or sexy, at least not aloud. We're conditioned to seek acceptance from others and for many girls this causes problems well into adulthood.
So, let's get back to me. ;-)
I am humble and my secret to liking myself is by not comparing myself to others. Instead I compare myself to the way I've looked during the different times in my life. I can say, "This is the best I've ever looked."or "I can look better." I take stock of what I'm doing or not doing, how I feel mentally and physically and I add that to the equation when evaluating myself. What would be the point in comparing myself to anyone else?
People, like cities, have lost their individuality through chain stores and stereotypes. When you happen to find someone unique (without trying too hard because that's just as obvious), it's a special and exciting feeling. I hope that the gentlemen I have met have found me to be different (in a good way) and I hope the gentlemen I will someday meet find me to be a breath of fresh air. I like the feeling of bringing something special to someone's life.
My new website is up and running. I will warn you though, the text is in desperate need of updating. Unfortunately my site has not refreshed for me and I am unable to change the text or check my email at this time. Until then, I hope you enjoy my photos and the new design, which is streamlined, much like me.
Kate's New Site!
posted by Kate Bishop at 4:52 PM
2 Comments:
Hi Kate -
Smashing success my dear! Partly because the photos are both sophisticated and simple, but primarily because the photographer let Kate be Kate.
I have always found you to be different in an unforgettably positive, graceful, honest, beautiful and uncompromizing way. The way we met, talking on our cell phones through a glass door, you outside and me inside, was unlike any other first encounter in my life. Then you treated me to a latte and better conversation than I had enjoyed for a long time, even in Boston or Cambridge.
So...here I am (and others, too) on the East Coast, never forgetting you and realizing what we have lost.
Please reverse the curse, Kate!! (Someday?)
-David
"I often wonder how low self-esteem and being a paid companion can possibly go hand-in-hand. After all, how can someone with self-esteem problems possibly post their near naked photos on the Internet and then demand hundreds of dollars for her time? Every paid companion must be a narcissist at some level."
You couldn't possibly be farther off with this comment.
In a past life, I was a professional photographer, working almost exclusively with beautiful young women. You cannot imagine a more insecure, self-esteem-challenged group of people.
Interestingly, the ones asking for the highest rates were the ones with the most fragile egos. Dollars equal validation, and more dollars equals more resounding validation. And when they couldn't get their asking rates, even if it was only because they were out of tune with the market, they were devastated.
I'm a hobbyist, so obviously I can only speak in terms of theory here -- but I think that a lot of women who are providers (at least the ones without pimps or drug habits), are in it for some of the same reasons. They have an emotional need for the strokes that they get from getting paid to do what other women do for free. In their own minds, it makes them 'special'.
And that, my good woman, is dysfunctional as hell. Not 'sick', but not altogether healthy, either. And most definitely not grounded in high self-esteem.
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